Up to our Ass in Bob's

I guess to the casual Rocket Scientist, building a replica of a mars rover is child’s play. However, to a child, building that replica looks like rocket science. And, then there is me; playground supervisor for the Wailer Work’s Skunk Patch.

During the past week or so, I have been involved in multiple project that all went south somehow. Which leads me back to the Works to see how the Rastafarians are doing.

Quite well actually given how few brain cells they have to rely on these days. The build summary is as follows:

1. Everything is friggin done.

Oh, except that Bob’s ass is dragging. And, we can’t have a Drag Ass Bob on Mars. Why, you ask? Idiot! Because a rover can’t rove with the sand up its ass. Unless, it is actually mining for gold or whatever the fuck is on is on Mars.

 

Now for the Rocket Science part. Go get some popcorn. This is going to take a while to explain to you Bernie Sanders followers. See, in the real world, and on Mars, 2+1+5 does not equal egalitarianism. Particularly, when you don’t own the 2, the 1, or the 5. But, that is not Bob’s problem. Bob’s problem is that he can’t get it up. His derriere that is.

 

Maybe a visual would help you understand. 

See! A picture is worth a thousand words. I’ll use a couple of thousand words here to explain the picture.

 

Bob’s ass is dragging because Bob is unbalanced, much like Ted Cruz. Bob’s genius designer, Willy Wailer, forgot that the suspension would fulcrum off of the body with nothing to keep Bob from tumbling one way or another. (Not sure about Cruzer’s problem.)

 

But FRIGGIN WAIT A FREAKING MINUTE. Didn’t we say that we are making a replica of a mars rover? Isn’t that the entire point of this exercise? So, what did NASA do about the problem? (Actually, I have to confess that the mars stuff was built by JPL.) There is a huge load off my ass... I mean mind.)

 

Certainly JPL must have confronted this issue prior to launch because the mars rovers did not drag their ass around the planet. “What would JPL do?” Or, more precisely, what the fuck did they do anyway?

 

We’ll Grasshopper here are some great pictures that show how JPL approached the problem. Enjoy.

 

https://www.google.com/search?q=mars+rover+curiosity+rocker-bogie+suspension&rlz=1T4GUEA_enUS610US610&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj93_Ocr-HKAhUT9mMKHY3HCkUQ_AUICCgC&biw=1280&bih=610#tbm=isch&tbs=rimg%3ACc_1EtS_1nWzbJIjikApx-pIdiAK6HgjVNjUBp_1nCOvx-QC6owN68vpMiVqZNs39VQ3TvWimCql5395aD3jTieeJbCLCoSCaQCnH6kh2IAEef5fw5CSFKIKhIJroeCNU2NQGkRFNfs70zioIIqEgn-cI6_1H5ALqhHn-X8OQkhSiCoSCTA3ry-kyJWpERTX7O9M4qCCKhIJk2zf1VDdO9YRypjFIsmYqIAqEgmKYKqXnf3loBE6fJMFUuy-4ioSCfeNOJ54lsIsEQpn17Jvg5Lr&q=mars%20rover%20curiosity%20rocker-bogie%20suspension&imgrc=_

 

Big Hint #2. 'Rocker-Bogie Suspension with a Mechanical Differential'. Wailer Works is on it now baby.

Current picture sneaked out of the Works.